Anyone could tell you the short and sweet version: Fake it till you make it. But what does that really mean in practice? Introverted people are naturally too soft spoken to make any social waves. Extroverted people may seem the most confident, but it doesn't necessarily means they have nothing to hide.
All my life, I’ve faced this overarching theme that Western, blonde haired, tan, gorgeous, is the most superior form of beauty. Thus, growing up as shy, almond-eyed and all-around cliche Asian, I didn’t know how I could even consider myself more beautiful than a European-looking girl. After all, other than the spies and terrorists we play on TV, how many leading Asian girls do you see in the movies or other media? You could probably count them with just your fingers.
It’s not that I ever thought I was ugly or worthless, it’s just that I didn’t realize that beauty is an extremely subjective state of mind. Everyone has their own beauty standards, but I know that I can also be beautiful by my own standards and that’s even better if you ask me. So here are some steps to achieve self confidence and maximize your inner beauty:
Morning:
- Pick out your outfit the night before. Check the weather and plan it out so that you don’t have to stress about coordinating an outfit when your half-awake
- Spray something fresh like body spray or cologne (or even Febreeze if your cheap) If you smell good, you just might feel good
- Wear comfortable yet clean shoes
- Pack some snacks for your day and a water
- Smile at yourself in a mirror right before you leave your house/apt/dwelling
Afternoon:
- Spark a conversation with someone in your proximity whether it be work, school, club, etc.
- Listen, laugh, and make a connection
- Sit, walk, move with shoulders open and back, eyes looking out and not into your phone
- Keep a small plant at your desk, office, or pick a flower
- Have a good lunch and go outside at least once for pleasure
Evening:
- Call someone you love
- Invite a friend, neighbor, associate over for dinner
- Have interesting conversation
- Walk your dog, feed your fish, water your plant
- Get a healthy amount of sleep
Feeling good about yourself is all about finding a balance between dedicating time for others and making time for yourself. Living for yourself is simply not enough. Forming relationships and making a positive impact on the lives of others makes life fulfilling and worthwhile. It will give you a sense of purpose and thus enough self-confidence to serve that purpose.
Beautiful people are not just a pretty face or set of six pack abs. Beautiful people have a beautiful heart with a genuine passion for others. Beautiful people have a personality that is simply intoxicating. Now, none of theses are any beauty secrets by any means. I have no beauty product to endorse or brand to rave about. This is because true, lasting beauty starts from within your soul. There’s nothing in the world you could buy that will change who you are on the inside. Maybe a little mascara and some lipstick never hurt anyone, but when it comes down to it, who you at the core will always show through no matter what you wear.
*Disclaimer: Though I love fashion, wear makeup occasionally, and maybe even photoshop that zit I had last week, sometimes a little primping can be enough to boost your inner beauty out. If dying your hair teal is what makes you feel beautiful, then go for it. If getting that septum piercing has been your goal, do it. Just be you from the inside out.
xx Ella-Kol